Tough Patch

Over the last few days, we've found ourselves in a little bit of a downward trend. Cassidy is back to being a little more fearful and clingy as she was several weeks ago. She is also more extreme with her emotions. There is a lack of carryover peace from one activity to the next. By that I mean she can be fine if you're doing something that she likes, and you're screwed if you aren't. Last night, she loved me if I was walking her up and down the stairs (over and over and over again), feeding her, or putting lotion on her (did you know Asians are prone to dry skin?). If I wasn't doing those things, she really didn't want to have anything to do with me. I guess the good news is that she seemed a little more content in general after I did all of the stair walking than she was prior to that. I got to enjoy her most intense sleep-time crying ever. She finally quieted down when she decided to go #2 just before completely dozing off (not a good combo). Miraculously, she slept through the diaper change. I think I used up all of my mojo on that, though, because she ended up waking up around 3:30 and joining us in bed... again.

I am looking forward to the day that she no longer cries as she leaves Mommy's gravitational pull. I'm looking forward to her no longer crying herself to sleep in my arms. In the meantime, I try to marvel and wonder about her idiosyncracies. For example, when she cries in my arms, she tends to cover up her wide-open mouth with her arm. It's like she's screaming, but she doesn't want to be heard. It makes me wonder if this came from the orphanage experience and what that experience was exactly. A funnier behavior is when she wants me to read her a book (or three words off of one page), she kneels down to look and listen. After a sentence or two (or a word or two), she'll get up take the book from me, walk a couple steps, turn around, hand me the book, and repeat the process multiple times.

The excellent news of yesterday was that we finally received Cassidy's official citizenship document. She's bonafied American now.